Duty to Warn

AUSTIN, Texas -- Gosh, the most balloons EVER! I bet all you slackers out there who weren't watching are sorry now.

Just a few hints to Gov. George W. Bush's speechwriter: When you go into the riff about "I want to change the tone of Washington to one of civility and respect," try putting it more than two paragraphs away from your last attempt to stick a shiv in the Democrats.

If it had come just a few grafs later, we might already have forgotten the seven paragraphs of jabs at Al Gore, including the one that worked, "He now leads the party of Franklin Delano Roosevelt, but the only thing he has to offer is fear itself."

See? Just a little more separation, and you can have your cake and eat it, too. You can trash the D's and still call for "civility and respect" without being accused of hypocrisy.

Item Two: For eight years, the R's have been attacking Bill Clinton with a focus that often bordered on the maniacal. It is simply an obsession. And it has never worked.

AUSTIN, Texas -- My favorite factoid gathered by the 15,000 underutilized reporters in Philadelphia is that the opening gavel of the Republican National Convention was "acoustically enhanced" by a sound engineer to sound "better than real." Yup.

I loved the blind mountain-climber giving the Pledge of Allegiance. (Hint to Dems: In South Texas, we have twin dwarfs with 12 fingers apiece who play the accordion.) Of course, everybody noticed that there were more black faces on the stage than in the audience, but that's nothing.

At the 1972 Republican convention, there was an Ethnic Night party at which I saw John Volpe, the Italian-American secretary of transportation, doing the frug while a Chinese girl sang "Never on Sunday" in Yiddish. Is this a great country or what? Except the Republicans have proved yet again the tragic truth that White People Can't Clap On Beat. Or is it just Republicans?

By the way, one quarter of the Republican delegates are millionaires, and fewer than 10 percent of them make less than $50,000 a year.

PHILADELPHIA -- Every day at noon, a couple of blocks from the convention complex where GOP delegates held their caucuses, destitute men lined up for lunch on the sidewalk in front of the Ministry to the Homeless. It was not a photo op.

More than a few journalists were visiting Philadelphia -- in fact, about 15,000 of them arrived to cover the Republican National Convention. But midway through the week, an aide at the Ministry to the Homeless told me, not a single reporter had dropped by to inquire about the bedraggled spectacle.

"We feed homeless guys," the staff member said. "Yesterday, we fed 223." At least three-quarters of them, he estimated, were living on the streets in the City of Brotherly Love.

Is this kind of situation unusual for an American city? He shook his head. "There's homelessness wherever you go."

That night, I overheard a few delegates discussing news coverage of the convention. About the only negative theme emerging, they agreed, was that the event had been carefully staged. "If the criticism is that it's scripted," said one, "well, God bless it."

AUSTIN, Texas -- For those of us trying to get our slacker fellow citizens to pay attention to this absorbing presidential race, life is looking up a little.

Gov. George W. Bush was complaining last week about attacks by Democrats -- he frequently does that -- and then he added, in his sunny, positive way:

"Secretary Cheney brought people together and helped win a war, which stands in contrast to Vice President Al Gore, who tends to divide people, to create war."

I like this pattern. Bush used it quite successfully against John McCain in the primaries, time and again. Bush would say something tacky about McCain, who would then say something tacky about Bush; then Bush would loudly protest that he was being attacked. "This is nothing but attack politics, and aren't we all tired of attack politics?"

He had a whole ad campaign complaining that McCain had compared him to Bill Clinton. Then he'd say something else tacky about McCain.

It’s summertime and the reading should be easy. Or, at least, fun and educational for progressives. Here are the books I’m enjoying this summer: A double dose of Texas populism at its best in the new books by Jim Hightower, If The Gods Had Meant Us To Vote They Would Have Given Us Candidates, and Molly Ivins’ and Lou Dubose’s Shrub, The Short But Happy Political Life Of George W. Bush.

Ivins, a syndicated columnist for the Fort Worth Star-Telegram (who thankfully appears in the Free Press) and Dubose, the editor of the Texas Observer, a Freep role model, are long-time observers of the notorious Bush dynasty. A clan I personally believe to be the most evil political family in the United States history. Shrub does an excellent job of cataloging the rise of “Dubya’s” bizarre career and fabricated imagery. If you thought George W. was a drunken frat boy ne’er do well who shamelessly leveraged his father’s political power to gain preferential treatment, and a governorship, now you’ve got the facts.

Political observers are predicting massive protests and civil disobedience at the Republican convention in Philadelphia and the Democratic convention in L.A. this summer. Many political analysts believe this new wave of militant progressive political dissent started with the outburst in Columbus in 1998 at CNN’s Town Hall Meeting on Iraq. The mood of protest escalated last fall during the battle of Seattle. The demonstrations turned into a full-scale movement this spring at the IMF/World Bank meeting in Washington D.C. Not since the New Left’s last stand against Reagan in Detroit in 1980 or the 1972 Republican convention in Miami have the major party conventions inspired such dedicated counter-demonstrators.

AUSTIN, Texas -- Aside from the fact that they look like Howdy-Doody and Mr. Bluster, Dick Cheney appears to be an excellent choice for George W. Bush. Sounds moderate, governs right. Very W. Bush.

Cheney's voting record is slightly to the right of wiggy. Against a resolution to free Nelson Mandela after he had spent 23 years in prison? Against abortion to save the life of the mother? Against a ban on cop-killer bullets? Against Head Start and the Department of Education?

This was not in some prehistoric era when dinosaurs ruled Congress -- these votes were considered extreme at the time. Yet one hears commentators who dismiss Cheney's record as "irrelevant."

Speaking of the record, there's one that needs to be set straight. On a busy news day, an important education report by Rand, the California think tank, got relatively little coverage. That's a shame, because the study confirms hopeful news about how to improve the public schools. Rand says that smaller class sizes, enrolling more children in preschool, giving teachers more classroom materials and targeting additional money for poor children pay off.

Once again, it's the season of the Republican and Democratic national conventions, this time choreographed in Philadelphia and Los Angeles. Both events have been underwritten by business patrons; both cities are notorious for police misconduct. Hospitality and brutality -- the contrasts could hardly be more extreme.

In the City of Brotherly Love, the welcome mat was embossed with great riches. The Republican convention is brought to you by movers and shakers of Wall Street.

The Grand Old Party's jamboree ended up with a pricetag in excess of $50 million, mostly supplied via corporate donations. The same sort of financing is in the pipeline for the Democratic convention (estimated cost: $35 million) in the middle of August. The symmetry of the largess is breathtaking.

AUSTIN, Texas -- "He should be ashamed." So said Gov. George W. Bush after Vice President Al Gore pointed out that there are 1.4 million uninsured children in Texas.

Somebody should be ashamed. And now on to the topic du jour. It's like, duh. Just when you thought there wasn't a dime's worth of difference between the two parties, the Republicans go and prove you're wrong.

The R's have been on a tax-cutting spree, intoxicated by the prospect of huge surpluses. In tax stories, you always need to read the second paragraph, or the ninth, or wherever they've hidden the Catch-22. The trouble with TV news is that they never have time to get to the second paragraph.

Here's the second paragraph: In a truly startling class warfare assault, the R's have rigged every one of their recent tax adjustments to favor the rich. You might think that's no skin off your nose, but the less that rich people pay, the more of the tax burden has to be borne by you. Duh.

AUSTIN, Texas -- Thank goodness! Just in the nick of time, up shows the Proud of Texas Committee to "act as a resource on Texas facts for members of the media between now and the November election."

And look at the variety of citizens on this committee!

Mike Levy, publisher of Texas Monthly, two lobbyists, a state employee and a guy who sells cement to the state. And they have absolutely nothing in common, except they're all supporting George W. Bush! Thank heavens, objectivity at last.

The Proud of Texas Committee is concerned lest Texas "suffer damage from the kind of political firestorms that often are driven by national campaigns." Further, the group wants to "safeguard the state from the adverse effects of a political firestorm and base political expediency." Oh no, not base political expediency! Anything but that!

To this noble end, the Proud of Texas Committee has sent a letter to Vice President Al Gore really giving him what-for because "the home state of a presidential contender can suffer enormous damage as a result of inaccuracies and misrepresentations."